Insights

Sun is waiting to rise

Have you ever felt like not participating in anything that is going on?

The social discourses and activities can sometimes feel shallow.

Sometimes I wonder what value people get by discussing the price of the groceries they bought on the weekend.

I disconnected myself from most of the mundane chores long back.

To shut down the doors for shallow people and turn down the rave parties.

But it left me with a huge void, and it felt like a mistake.

Many of those “friends” missed me for a while and then forgot about me. I don’t yet know how to feel about it. Maybe I don’t want to know.

But it gave me time. To reflect, to accommodate a new understanding.

I felt the void because I was constantly trying to do something.

Even relaxing was an event back then.

Spiritual Materialism.

I was telling myself stories about detachment, but in reality, why would a question arise of detachment when there is no participation in the first place?

In reality, I was disconnected.

I had fallen into the shadow world. Nothing was happening.

In the retreat from the world, I reached the pinnacle of non-doing and fell into the dark valley of non-thinking.

Hopelessness spread in the darkest moment of the night.

But then, a friend lent his hand. And the books gave me a chance.

I started taking long bike rides in the Western Ghats.

Soon to realised that, if you want to practice detachment; you have to participate in the phenomenon called life.

It is not that bad, to have a small conversation about simple and beautiful things in life.

If done with the people you care for, the nature of these conversations can be aligned to the nature of yourself.

It offers an occasion to connect.

In the darkest moment of the night, the sun is waiting to rise.

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